After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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