i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
