my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
how drunk are you?
Several
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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