Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
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