i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
