everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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