Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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