There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
only if we run a train.
done.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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