I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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