The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
