he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Randomize
