i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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