I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
