Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize