you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize