I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I just blew my weed a kiss
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
