addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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