Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
