He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
