i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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