Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
