Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Randomize
