Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
