honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
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