i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
