oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I'm really busy with my period
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