No, you can still breathe under the balls.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
