On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Randomize
