If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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