I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize