whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
