mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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