and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
