If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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