I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
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