remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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