Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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