If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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