Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
