I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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