we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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