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• (540): View more from Virginia

  At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.

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• (909): View more from California

  Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.

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• (845): View more from New York

  I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.

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• (310): View more from California

  I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.

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• (323): View more from California

  How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.

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• (239): View more from Florida

  I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.

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