i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Randomize