I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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