I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
