Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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