Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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