do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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