You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
You work out of a Hotel?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize