So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
