Dual....:-)
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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